Gone
by immieimke
Summary: This story is about the BAU team from criminal minds. Especially about Spencer Reid, who has a big sister. In her hometown things go slightly wrong and suddenly she needs the protection of the whole BAU team. Hope you enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

It is a very normal day, a day like any other. I wake up around six am from the pain in my stomach. My baby is growing big now and she started kicking, making me unable to get a good couple of hours sleep. Even though it makes me cranky and really tired, it is all worth it. Totally worth it, everything for my little child. From the age of sixteen I have wanted a child and now it is finally happening, with the perfect husband to help me. Kyle, I met him when I was twenty one and we have been married for six years now, he's my true love, as you can say. I'm now twenty nine, almost thirty and I'm finally getting a baby. It makes me so unbelievably happy that all it does to me physically is worth it.  
I get up from the bed and see that the spot next to me is already empty. I smile, Kyle is a police officer and always gets called in to work early. While pondering about it, I walk to the window and throw the curtains open. Warm sunshine shines through and I close my eyes, enjoying the warmth on my skin for a moment before my growling stomach interrupts me. I chuckle and walk to my closet, putting on my bath robe before walking downstairs. It takes me a little longer now to walk anywhere, my stomach is getting quit big now, making all my movements slower and harder. I don't really care, as long as my little baby inside me is okay, I am to. I bake some eggs for myself and slowly eat it all. I have never been a big eater, but I have too now cause I have two mouths to fill. I'm quit the opposite of Spencer in that way. Spencer, my little brother.

He's not so little anymore though, he turned twenty six two months ago already. I smile when I think of him, he will always stay my little brother, no matter how old he gets. He always makes me smile, even when he's just a thought in my mind. Spencer means the world to me, he's literally everything to me. He's my best buddy and we know everything about each other. Spencer is not exactly normal, he's a genius. He's unbelievably brilliant, graduated high school when he was twelve and finished his study at the age of sixteen. Spencer is a profiler, he works for the BAU in California, which is quit far away from Virginia but that doesn't matter. Whenever he can he comes to visit me, especially now I'm pregnant, almost every weekend he shows up and only his job can stop him from that. He always calls me when he has a case and always apologises, though he doesn't have to. Spencer hasn't exactly had a really good life, with his brilliancy he was badly teased in school, bullied and sometimes even beaten up. Me as his big sister, always protected him, no matter what it cost me. I was a quit popular kid in school, but not the kind of popular girl that would bully weaker ones to get herself higher up. No, I was popular because I was nice to everybody, which made me quite strong. And everybody knew Spencer was my brother, so no one dared to do something to him and if they did, and he would come home with bruises ore crying, I would make them pay for it. Spencer may be brilliant and socially awkward, but he is such an adorable, cute, sweet boy when you get to know him.

I love Spencer dearly, always have and always will. I have always been there for him, like he has been for me. We both had a very hard time when mom was diagnosed with schizophrenia and had to be taken into a hospital. We had decided to call the nurses because she wouldn't do it herself and it was very hard to watch her being taken while crying and begging us to not do this to her. Especially Spencer had a hard time, because he and mom had a very special bond.

The rest of the day goes by slowly, I read a book on the couch for a couple of hours, call mom and try to call Jessica, a friend of mine but she doesn't pick up. I change into normal clothes, as far as that's possible with my belly and settle back down on the couch.

At three pm the doorbell rings and a bit confused I stand up from the couch. I'm not expecting someone, Spencer is in California and Kyle is at work. Who could it be?


	2. Chapter 2

Gone chapter 2

I stumble to the door and open it, to find indeed my little brother standing in front of my door. "Spence!" I call out happily and he smiles his brilliant cute smile at me, before wrapping his arms tightly around me. "Abby!" He cheers back and I giggle, while hugging him close. "I missed you." I tell him while letting go and he nods, agreeing. "I missed you too Ab, how's the little one?" He asks me and strokes my stomach, before I let him in.  
I start to make coffee for him while he puts down his coat and bag, before walking into the kitchen. "What exactly are you doing here Spence? I didn't expect you to come down here until next week." I ask him and hear him sigh, which makes me frown, Spencer only sighs when something troubles him. "Well, technically we had a case, but we weren't invited by the local police statement, so we had some time off. I thought first about going to mom, but because she would not be expecting me I thought I'd come here, I haven't seen you in two weeks anyway." He answers me and I smile, listening to his rambling. Spencer always rambles about science and technology and everyone else always cuts him off, but I never do. "It's really nice Spence, how's work anyway?" I ask him and we chat a little about cases and the monsters that live in our world while I finish making his coffee and we move to the couch. He talks to me some more about how Henry is doing, his godson. JJ, his mother, is one of the closest friends of Spencer, she's in his BAU team too, so are all his close friends actually.  
We decide to watch a movie together, a little tradition we have. When we were little, around the age of twelve, we would always watch a movie Saturday night in my room. We weren't supposed to so it was always very exiting and we would close all the curtains and cuddle up on my bed. We stick to that now still, though it isn't very exiting anymore.

Spencer closes the curtains while I put 'the notebook' in. The notebook is by far my favourite movie and even though Spencer hates it, he always watches it with me. We curl up on the couch together, his arms around me and my head on his chest, like always and watch the movie. I listen to his endless ramblings about love and about the movie and how technically some things couldn't really be true.  
At six I start cooking while Spencer is on the phone with first JJ, then Emily and after that Penelope Garcia, the technical annalist of their team. Their team is like a little family together and if someone can make him smile, they are.

At six thirty I hear the front door open and smile, Kyle's home. "Hi honey, I'm home." I hear indeed his voice call out to me and push Spencer into the living room, telling him to make the table ready for dinner. "Hi baby." I mumble when Kyle walks into the kitchen, looking all handsome and professional. "Hello my love, how have you been today?" He asks me with an exited smile and wraps his arms strongly around me, pulling me to his chest. "Quit good actually, and you my policeman." I ask him a little taunting and he smiles down at me, kissing me softly. "Your policeman off course caught all the bad guys in town today." He whispers in my ear and I shake my head, chuckling. "Off course you have baby." I laugh and kiss him once again, before he lets me go and crouches down in front of my stomach. "And how's my baby girl doing, how's the little one. You know, daddy did a lot today, a lot that will make you remember him forever when you get born." He says and kisses my stomach before standing back up. "Dinner is ready in five minutes honey, maybe you could shower after." I tell him and wink at Spencer, who just enters the kitchen.  
"Hi Kyle." He says and Kyle turns around in confusion. "He Spencer..." He mumbles back and turns his head to me, instantly looking angry. "I'm goanna shower." He announces and storms out of the kitchen at once. "Baby?" I call after him but he doesn't answer. That was really weird. Kyle always liked Spencer, why would he act like that. I shrug and look at Spencer, who looks awkwardly at the ground. "Spence, that was not because of you. I don't know why he acted like that but I'll talk to him, okay!" I tell him and capture his face in my hands, making him look at me. "Okay." He answers back and smiles, before grabbing the bowls where I put the food in. "Should we wait for Kyle?" He asks while he sits down at the table and I shake my head at him, I feel I'm pretty mad at my husband for acting like that. "No, he can eat alone." I mumble and we start to eat. At first there's a lot of silence, before I break it with a couple questions. I can't stand awkward silences, especially not with Spencer. We end up chatting and laughing while cleaning the table and putting everything in the dishwasher. Kyle still hasn't come back from upstairs, so I put some of the food in the fridge so he can eat it later.

"Oh Ab, JJ called that there is probably a new case soon, so I won't be staying too long." Spencer informs me while looking up from his phone. We're playing chess together, there's a hundred per cent chance that he wins every time we play, but he loves to explain everything to me so I play with him, no matter how boring it is ore how bad I lose. "Oh, that's too bad." I mumble back before picking up my queen and put it somewhere else on the board. "That's good Spencer, how long are you staying anyway?" Kyle's voice sounds from behind me and I turn around quickly. It sounded really offending and angry how Kyle said it and I see Spencer noticed it as well, cause he hangs his head and doesn't answer. "I asked you something Spencer." Kyle repeats and I stand up, really angry now. "That's enough, I need to talk to you Kyle, now!" I interrupt him with a glare and he shrugs, while walking into the kitchen with a big sigh. I kiss Spencer on his cheek lightly before I follow my husband into the kitchen.


	3. Chapter 3

Gone chapter 3

"What the hell is this attitude Kyle?" I ask my husband when I close the door and he shrugs. "What do you mean, I just asked him how long he wanted to stay." Kyle defends and I sigh deeply, shaking my head. "He is my little brother Kyle, I love him dearly and he is welcome to stay here as long as he wants, whenever he wants, understand?" I tell him with my voice full of anger and he pulls up his eyebrows. "This is my house too..." He starts, but I glare at him and shut him up. "Don't you dare go that way Kyle, the way you asked him was very inappropriate, it sounded like you wanted him to leave right now and I won't tolerate that. You can tell me if something bothers you, you can ask me anything, but you don't go off on him like that." I almost jell and put my arms around my stomach, soothing the baby inside me, telling her that it's okay.

Kyle stares at me for a moment, but then his eyes soften and he sighs deeply. "You're right, that was very inappropriate off me, I'm sorry." He apologises and I shake my head. "Oh Kyle, you weirdo. What is bothering you?" I ask him, glad I don't have to jell at him anymore. He just sighs again and walks up to me, wrapping his arms around me. "I just hadn't expected him and I really wanted to enjoy this evening with you." He whispers temptingly in my ear and I grin at him. "Hmm, well I would've liked that to but we can do that any other time baby, you know that. There will be plenty alone time for you and me and when there is, I suggest you keep your uniform on." I taunt and kiss him lightly, flirting a little. He chuckles and rolls his eyes, before kissing me back, harder this time. "Hmm, babe not now... Will you do me a favour please and apologise to Spence. He doesn't feel welcome right now and he should never feel that way in my house." I whisper and break up the kiss. He rolls his eyes, but smiles and walks into the living room. I hear his husky voice and assured that he apologised I start to make his dinner ready. I give it to him and the rest of the night I spend watching movies with my two favourite men in the world.

The next morning I wake up unusually late, around eight am. Normally my girl starts kicking earlier so I can't help but feel worried while I get up. I shower and dress, before walking downstairs. When I walk into the living room I notice Spence, still asleep on the couch. That confuses me, yes we had the visitors room changed into our still to come daughters room, but that doesn't mean my little brother has to sleep on the couch. He looks so cute while asleep I can't get it over my heart to wake him up and silently I start to make breakfast. I ruin it all in the end when I drop my frying pan and it drops on the floor with as much noise as it could possibly make, startling Spence. He sits up immediately and rubs in his eyes, groaning. "Morning Spence, sorry bout that." I jell towards the living room and I hear him moan, before he falls back and tries to go on sleeping. I put our breakfast on the table and watch how he drifts back to sleep. I watch how his breathing slows down and I suddenly get the motivation to wake him up, also an old tradition. Spencer has one major weakness and till now only I know about it. He's severely ticklish, I've used it against him all my life and now I think about it, I haven't tortured him in quit a while. I smirk and very silently walk up to the couch, crouching in to jump. I am pregnant now, my stomach isn't that big but it's already making it harder for me to move so I have to be careful to not crush Spence when I jump on him. He's already so thin, like literally really thin.  
Very carefully I crouch down deeper and then I jump, making Spencer groan and opens his eyes instantly with a big 'oof'. I quickly place myself on top of his waist and smirk at him. "What the hell Abby? What are you doing?" Spencer moans and tries to struggle out but that's impossible, especially now with the weight of my baby with me. "I thought that it would be fun to repeat another old tradition." I tell him and he looks at me in confusion. I just stare back at him, he's brilliant, he will figure it out any minute. Indeed, after a couple seconds his eyes grow wide and he shakes his head violently. "No, no Abby, don't you dare to do that to me." He demands and tries to struggle out of my grip but it's useless. "I knew you'd figure it out." I tease and grab his arms, pinning them down under my knees, he's completely helpless now and he knows it. "No, Abby please... I'm too old for that, we're not kids anymore, don't do it!" He tries again, trying to talk himself out of it but I just chuckle. "It will not matter how old you are Spencer, understand?" I demand while squeezing his sides twice, making him squeal and giggle. "Yes, yes I understand, it doesn't mean that you can just keep doing it to me Ab." He squeals and finally gives up struggling. "Well, I think I can." I say and dig my fingers in his sides.  
Spencer jumps, squeals and bursts out in laughter, trashing all over the place. "God Abby, stop!" He jells out, but I just squeeze his sides some more, before I move on to his stomach, his second most ticklish spot. He screams and throws his head back in laughter, which makes me chuckle. He's so adorable, laughing so hard like this and begging me to have mercy. It brings me back to when we were teenagers, whenever he was sad ore cranky this was my way of making him smile, always. "Abby, I'm begging you! Mercy... MERCY!" He screams again through his laughter and I shake my head, grabbing one of his arms and pin it down over his head, while I keep taunting his stomach with my other hand. "God Abby no, not there, I'll do anything, please..." Spencer starts begging when he realises what I'm about to do and starts struggling again. "A little more Spence, then you're free to go." I taunt and dig my fingers in his exposed armpit. He completely loses control, trashes around while he laughs hysterically. His armpits are by far his worst tickling spot and I wouldn't be his big sister if I didn't know that. "Abby STOP, no, no, no, no, no, no, I give, I give, stop!" He manages to scream and I decide he has had enough with that. I stop and climb off him, leaving him panting and gasping for breath on the couch. "Don't ever do that again." He gasps and sits up, hugging his knees. "I'm sorry baby but sometimes I have to." I chuckle and kiss his cheek before sitting back down at the table. He sighs but gets up and sits down next to me. Together we eat breakfast, Kyle already gone to work.


	4. Chapter 4

Gone chapter 4

"Why exactly did you sleep on the couch?" I ask Spencer suddenly, remembering I had even offered him Kyle's spot. "Well, when I told Kyle you had told me I could sleep in his spot in the bed, he told me I would never even dare to do that and that I could sleep on the couch." Spence answers and I feel anger coming up inside me. "He can be such an asshole sometimes, like a real asshole." I groan and grab Spencer's hand, squeezing it. "I don't know what's bothering him Spence, but I will talk to him about it." I tell him and he nods, smiling his adorable smile at me, before he stands up. "I'm goanna take a shower okay, see you in a bit." He says and disappears through the door. I start cleaning up and when everything is in the dishwasher, the doorbell rings.  
A little confused I walk to the hall to open the door, who could this be. Spence is upstairs, Kyle is working, maybe it's Jessica. I open the door and three people stand in front of my door. A blonde woman with big blue eyes, and two men, one darker and the other one in a suit, looking really professional. "Hello, can I help you?" I ask them, who the hell are they? "Hello miss, are you Abby Reid?" The darker man asks and I nod, pulling up my eyebrows. "Yes, I am. Who are you?" I answer and the darker man grabs in his pocket. "I'm special agent Morgan from the FBI ma'am, and these are agents Jereau and Hotchner." He answers and shows me his badge. I smile brightly, I know who these people are. They are in Spencer's team of the FBI, two of his very close friends are standing in front of my door and his boss, if I don't get it wrong.

"Well off course, Derek, JJ and Hotch, what a pleasant surprise, wait a minute." I tell them and turn around. "Spence, your team is here." I scream towards the stairs before turning back around. They all look at me in confusion and I chuckle, stepping aside. "Sorry for that, please come in." I tell them and they step inside. I walk them to the living room and they sit down on the couches. "I'm sorry ma'am, but how do you know us?" Agent Jereau asks me and I frown at her. "Spencer talks, talks a lot about you guys so that's why I know." I answer and JJ shakes her head, while Morgan frowns back at me. They really look like they didn't understand a word what I just said. "I'm sorry ma'am, but how do you know Reid?" Morgan asks me and I look at him. "Spence is my little brother, I've known him since he was born, you didn't know that?" I answer him and he just stares at me, while JJ and Hotch look at each other. "You are Reid's big sister?" JJ asks and I nod, looking at them.

"Ab, what do you mean my..." Spencer walks in and stops midsentence when he sees his boss and two colleges sitting on the couch. He freezes and stares at them, while I stare at him. "Spence, why did you never tell us you had a sister?" JJ asks him and he just stares at her, confusion and shock on his face. "They really didn't know? Spence, you never told them?" I ask him and he shakes his head, looking at me with pleading eyes. "No, I've never told them." He answers and walks towards me, sitting down next to me.

I shake my head and look at Hotch, in the ten years Spence has been in their team he never told them once about me, not once. I can't help to feel a little offended, but I shake it off quickly.  
"Can I help you?" I ask again and they all break their trances and stares and focus back on the real reason they came here. "Yes, if you want to look at those photo's ma'am, we think you might recognise one ore two of the victims." Morgan mumbles and puts seven photo's on the table. I gasp when I look at the photo's and turn my head away, seven murdered woman stare at me through their dead eyes, blood everywhere. "These murders have happened in the last two days in this town ma'am, and we haven't been able to ID them yet, we thought maybe you could help us." Hotch explains to me and I look at the photo's. "Murders here in town?" I question and look at Spencer, who is focused on the photo's. "Yeah, I heard of them and I thought I'd visit you while I was off." He tells me and I shake my head, always protective of me, even though I'm his big sister. "Why didn't you tell me we had the case?" Spencer asks JJ and she shrugs. "We figured you'd be with your mother, since we thought she was the only relative you had, so Rossi and Em are looking for you there." She explains and he nods, looking a bit ashamed with the confrontation he's getting. "Okay, well what happened to them?" He asks and Morgan sighs. "The first victim we found two days ago had twenty stab wounds, was shot twice in the head and suffocated with a bag. The other six all have the same MO, they're all brunettes and with every victim there was over kill." He explains quickly and I gasp in horror, we have a monster in town. I look at the last picture and suddenly fear and sadness comes up. It's Jessica, my friend Jessica.

"O my God, Spence, that's Jessica." I whisper and pick up the last photo, looking at her wide open eyes, the fear is still clear. "Are you sure?" Spencer asks me, looking horrified while grabbing the photo. "Yes, that's Jessica. Why? Why would anyone do that to her?" I whisper, feeling tears come up.

Jessica, who I spoke to two days ago when she was still alive and happy. "She's dead, Spence..." I gasp and Spencer looks at me, sadness in his eyes. "I'm so sorry Ab, so sorry..." He whispers and wraps his arms around me, pulling me to his chest. I bury my head in his chest and burst down crying, how could this have happened. "We're deeply sorry for your loss ma'am." JJ whispers and grabs my hand, squeezing it. I inhale deeply and look up at her, tears steaming down my face. "Do you have any idea who did this?" I ask, my voice breaking twice, making Spencer flinch and hugging me tighter. "I promise you, we will find him, guys are there any leads?" He asks his colleges and Hotch frowns. "Well, now we know who she is we might have, Morgan call Garcia, ask her to pull up all her records." He tells Morgan and he nods, standing up while grabbing his phone.  
I feel so incredibly sad, my friend is dead, I loved her, I'd known her since I had been little and now she's just gone, dead. I wipe my tears away and sigh deeply, before looking back at the other photo's. "Wait a minute, I know her too." I gasp while looking at the first victim and release myself from Spence's hug. I pick up the photo and look closer, ignoring all the blood. "That's Macy, she lived two blocks from here." I whisper and look at the second photo. "And that's Melissa." I gasp and shudder, I know all the woman in the photo's. "Are you sure Ab?" Spencer asks me again and I nod in horror. "I know all of them, that is Hilda, that are Tina and Karin, that's Lauren. What is this Spence, why do I know all of them?" I whisper and turn away from the photo's, I don't understand.

"Okay ma'am, stay calm. It might be a coincidence that you all know them. We're goanna take a closer look to it now, JJ call Rossi and tell him and Prentiss to gather at the station. Reid, I expect you in my office in thirty minutes." Hotch orders and stands up, me and Spence following his move. "Hotch, I want to stay here, Abby might be in danger and..." Spencer protests but Hotch silences him with one glance. "We don't know anything yet Reid, make her call her husband so that he can be here, I expect you in my office in thirty minutes and that's an order." He orders again and Spencer sighs. "Yes sir." He mumbles and grabs my shoulders. "Okay Ab, I'm goanna be back soon, call Kyle anyway. I'm so sorry about Jessica honey, but don't jump to conclusions." He tells me and wraps me up in a tight hug. "I won't, stay safe please and I love you." I tell him silently and he kisses my forehead before letting me go. "Love you to, see you tonight." He says and walks out the room with Morgan and JJ right behind him. "We will find this man ma'am, don't be afraid, we will come back with further information soon." Hotch tells me and I nod at him before he disappears through my door and I'm alone. 


	5. Chapter 5

Gone chapter 5

I drop back on the couch and curl up in a ball, silently crying. What is going on, what is happening around me? I don't have any clue and the sadness of Jessica's death flows over me so tight I burst out crying again. I grab my phone and dial Kyle's number, I need him, especially now Spence has left. I dial his number and after the first ring he picks up.

 _"Hi baby."_ He mumbles and I sigh when I hear his voice. " _Kyle, I need you to come home."_ I tell him and I hear him gasp, my voice must sound exactly like how I feel. " _What's wrong honey, is it the baby? Honey tell me, what is wrong?"_ He asks, worry clear in his voice. _"Jessica... Kyle, Jessica is dead. The FBI just came and Jessica is dead, along with seven woman who I all knew."_ I explain shortly and I hear him gasp in horror. _"What? O my God, are you okay Abby? I'm coming home now baby, don't worry. Where's Spencer?"_ He asks and I sigh, wiping my tears away. _"He just went with them, it was his team who has the case, please come home..."_ I beg him and I hear him move around. _"I'll be there in twenty baby, don't worry, I'm coming."_ He mumbles and hangs up.

I curl up again, clinging to my phone while I cry, waiting for Kyle. It doesn't take him long to come back and after half an hour I hear the key twitching in the lock. I slowly sit up and watch the entrance of the living room, where Kyle appears with a worried expression on his face. "Oh Gosh, Abby!" He cries out when he sees me and runs up to me, cradling me up in his arms. I must really look that bad for him to react that way. I cling to him while he rocks me back and forth. "Abby, tell me what happened." He murmurs a little while later and I inhale deeply, before I tell him. How the FBI showed me the photo's and how I recognised Jessica and all the other women on the photo's.

"You think you are in danger? No Abby, believe me, I think it's a coincidence." Kyle tells me softly and I look up at him. "How do you know that, it can't really be a coincidence that I all knew that, can it?" I ask him angrily and untangle myself from his arms. "Relax baby, I didn't say that. You just got to stop worrying, I'm sure Spencer and the FBI are doing what they can." He assures me but his tone is a little bit off and I can't put my finger on it. "Yeah, I guess your right." I sigh and walk upstairs, I'm really tired and better get some sleep.  
The rest of the day goes by really slowly, Kyle joins me in bed and we both fall back asleep. At six we get up and I cook us diner, while my thoughts are with Jessica and Spencer. I wait anxiously for his arrival back here but he doesn't come back until eleven at night, when Kyle has already gone upstairs to prepare himself for bed.

Spencer looks really tired and he drops on the couch while I get him a cup of coffee. "How did it go?" I ask him and he sighs, wrapping an arm around me while sipping his coffee. "We don't think it's a coincidence that you know all the victims, but now we know who the victims are we have Garcia digging in their lives and we might have something by the morning." He tells me and I nod, snuggling up against his chest. He tells me how they all had to tell the victims family about their death and how it always makes him sad. I listen to his rambling and suddenly remember something from this morning.  
"Spence, I have to ask you something." I tell him and he stops talking, looking at me. "Yeah sure, go ahead." He says and I sigh deeply, before looking into his big, innocent eyes. "Spence, did you really never tell your team who I am?" I ask him and his eyes soften and he hangs his head, looking embarrassed. "I'm really sorry Ab, but no I never told them who you are. They didn't have any idea you existed." He tells me honestly and I look at him, shaking my head in disapproval. "Why not Spence? I mean, you told me so much about them I thought I already knew them for years and they come here and have no idea who I am. I'm sorry, but that kind a hurt." I tell him and feel him getting more embarrassed and sad with the second. "I know Ab, I know and I'm really sorry I never told them, really. I just, I guess I wanted to keep you for myself as long as possible. I'm not stupid, I knew they would find out sooner or later but until then I didn't want them to know about you." He explains to me while looking at me with pleading eyes, he's already begging me to forgive him. "Why?" I ask again, not understanding anything he said yet.

"Look, in my team everyone knows everything about each other, off course we do, we're profilers. We know about JJ's sister who committed suicide, we know about Morgan being sexually abused when he was little, we know about Hotch and Haley and Foyet, we know about Emily and Doyle, her past life undercover and I could go on and on. They off course know about me to, about my bullying, about mom and how dad left when I was ten and everything. I just didn't want them to know about you, I wanted to keep you for myself as long as possible. I know it sounds stupid, but that's just how I felt." He tries to explain to me again and looks at the ground when he's done talking.  
A big smile breaks through on my face and I take his face in my hands. "That's the sweetest thing you've ever done baby." I tell him and kiss him on his cheek, seeing his eyes lighting up. "Really? I'm forgiven?" He asks me and I nod, chuckling. "Yes, you're forgiven." I tell him and ruffle his hair. "Thank you." Spencer sighs in relief and wraps his arms around me tightly. "Just tell me next time okay, when you decide to do something like that." I mumble while being locked up in his arms. "I will, I will." He replies and I can see in his eyes he's really happy I forgave him. Spence has always hated it when someone is mad at him ore hurt by his actions, especially when it's me.

"Why was your boss so hard on you actually? Does he always order around like that?" I ask him, to curious to hold it in. Spencer chuckles and shakes his head. "No, Hotch is actually the best boss you can have, but because today the case turned personal for me, he has to be strict towards me before something happens." He explains and I nod understandingly, Spence somehow always ends up in trouble, no matter how careful he is so I can understand that. "Was he mad at you?" I ask, remembering the strict face Hotch gave him when he told him to be in his office in thirty minutes. "Yeah… He was." Spence sighs and rolls his eyes. "When I came into his office he went on and on about me hiding the fact that I had a sister and how irresponsible that was and blablabla." He complains and I chuckle, kissing his cheek.

I change the couch into a bed again and after kissing him goodnight I walk upstairs to join Kyle in bed. He wraps his arms around me and kisses me lightly. "Are you okay, baby?" He asks me, concern still clear in his voice and I nod in the dark, cupping his face in my hands. "I guess I'm okay, at least now I know Jess will get justice cause the best FBI team is put on this case and I believe they will catch him." I tell him and sigh deeply. "That doesn't change the fact though, that I'm scared about the fact that I know all the victims and might be in danger." I add and Kyle kisses me reassuringly. "I don't think you are in danger baby, trust me. Does Spencer have any leads?" He asks me and I frown. "I think so, but either way he wouldn't be able to tell us. He's not aloud to as an FBI agent on the case." I mumble, Kyle knows that, doesn't he? "Off course." Kyle sighs and I snuggle up against his chest, before we fall asleep together.


	6. Chapter 6

Gone chapter 6

It's not a very pleasant night for me. I wake up in the middle of the night from a horrible nightmare, where a guy in a mask terrorises my family and murders Spence and my unborn child and it takes me a while to realise it was just a dream. After that I fall into a restless sleep and by the morning, when my girl starts kicking I haven't had a proper hour sleep.

Kyle has gone to work and I don't hear anything from downstairs, which either means that Spence is already gone ore still asleep.

By the time I get downstairs, fully dressed and exhausted, the couch has transformed back into a couch and Spence is gone. I sigh, I had hoped someone would be with me today, but both my man are back at work. Kyle catching the bad guys in town and Spencer on the case of Jessica. That thought reminds me of her family and after breakfast I get into the car and drive down town towards her house.  
When I stop in front of it, it looks like everything is normal, like she's still living there, but when I get out of the car it's deathly silent. I walk up to the front door and ring the bell, hoping someone is home. After a while Jess her husband opens the door, looking like a wreck. His eyes are swollen and red, he has been crying, off course he has been crying. His wife is dead, what would I do if Kyle was dead. I shake the thought of me and give George a big hug.

"I'm so sorry George, so sorry." I whisper in his ear and feel my own tears coming up. "I know, we both lost her." He whispers back and I bury my head in his shoulder, keeping him tightly locked in my arms. He needs it, cause he completely breaks down in my arms. "Ssssh George, it's okay. Come on, we're going inside." I comfort him and pull him with me inside the house, closing the door behind us. I stay with him for a couple of hours to comfort him and to talk with him and around twelve their daughter Sylvia comes home from school. She looks as broken as George does, off course, she lost her wonderful mother.

"Hi Dad." She mumbles while walking into the living room and kisses him on the cheek. "Hi sweetheart." He responds and caresses her cheek lovingly. They only have each other left now, this must be so hard for them. "Hi Sylvia." I greet her and she smiles at me through her eyes full tears. "Hi Abby, I'm very sorry for your loss." She tells me and her bravery amazes me, but I smile reassuringly, angrily wiping away a tear that rolls down my cheek. "I'm truly sorry for your loss Sylvia, my door will always be open for you." I tell her and she nods, kissing me on the cheek as well. I'm sort of like an aunt for her, at least that's what our relationship has been through my eyes. "I appreciate it." She tells me softly before leaving the room, walking upstairs.  
"How has she been?" I ask George, who looks at the door she just disappeared through. "She's doing what she can, but we miss Jess." George answers and inhales deeply, probably to hold back more tears. "I know and I mean what I said, my door is always open. I loved Jess too and if I can do anything for you, just ask." I tell him while standing up and George follows my move. "Like Sylvia said, we really appreciate it. Thank you for everything already." He says and hugs me, before showing me the way outside. I step back in my car and wave at George before driving back home. In the car my sadness overflows and I burst out crying, there was so much sadness in Sylvia's eyes, so much pain in their hearts that it is too much for me to.  
When I get back I lay down on the couch and wait till my tears are dried, before I fall asleep, I'm exhausted. The ringing bell wakes me up again and I rush to the front door, thinking it might be Sylvia ore someone who needs me. I open the door and FBI agent Emily Prentiss stands on the step, together with Spence. Spencer immediately sees the sadness in my eyes and steps forward. "O gosh Ab, are you okay?" He asks in worry and I shake my head. "No I just went to Jess's house and comforted her husband and daughter. It was to much for me, sorry. Come in." I tell them and step aside, letting Spence and agent Prentiss enter the house. They walk towards the living room and sit down while I quickly make some coffee for them.  
"Hello Abby, I'm agent Emily Prentiss, a good friend of Reid and we are here to ask you some questions and we have a little more information for you." Prentiss greets me while I sit down next to Spence and I nod at her, I know her too from Spence's stories. "Hi Emily, thank you. Have you found the guy yet?" I reply and she shakes her head. "I'm afraid we haven't, but we are getting closer and closer, I can tell you that. Okay, listen carefully. I want you to think back over these four passed days and tell me if you have noticed something out of the ordinary." She asks me and I nod, thinking hard. The only thing weird I have seen is Kyle, but he would never do something like that, it hurts to even think about it. "No, I haven't actually." I say to her and Spence grabs my hand. "Think Ab, think about people taking distance, people you trust being weird, that kind a thing." He mumbles and I glare at him, he and I both know that's exactly what Kyle has been doing. "No, I'm sorry. I can't help you here." I say again and Prentiss nods, sighing. "Okay, well we also have bad news. We've found another body this morning and if you know her too, you are probably in danger." She tells me and I gasp, another body? "Another body, really?" I ask, looking at Spence and he nods at me, sadness in his eyes. I shudder and inhale deeply, before grabbing the photo Prentiss hands me. I give one look and close my eyes, handing the photo back. "Yes, I know her to. That's Judy, a girl I knew from high school." I tell her and Prentiss sighs deeply, taking the photo. "I'm so sorry, but I'm afraid you are in danger, because all these victims have one thing in commend, and that's you, which makes me forced to talk it down with you." She tells me, seriousness leaving her eyes and they turn soft, really friendly. "I'm really sorry this is happening Ab, and I wish I didn't need to do this to you but you have to call Kyle, that he stays home with you until we caught the man." Spence starts and wraps his arms around me in comfort, supporting me. I look up into his eyes and nod slightly, I could do that. "Also Abby, there will be two surveillance cars down this street to watch your house and your every movement, they will know when something happens." Emily adds and puts a hand on my knee, it's like she knows how awful it feels to be in protection because you might be in danger. It does feel terrible, my every movement will be watched, I know Kyle won't like that.

"And we're goanna give you a safety number to call, it's attached to all our phones and the first one who's phone is free will receive the call. I need you to call it Ab, whatever happens okay?" Spence mumbles, squeezing me tightly, knowing I must hate this very much. "Fine, I will. Can't you just stay here, for now if you have to go back. I need you here, I can't call Kyle in now, he's on surveillance somewhere and will not pick up." I whisper to him and he nods slowly, ignoring Prentiss' glance.

"Reid…" She starts, but Spence cuts her off, grabbing her hand. "Em, please. For me. I know Hotch will be angry, but I will not leave her like this." He begs her and she looks at him sceptically before nodding slowly. "Because it's you." She replies with a little grin and ruffles his hair, making him chuckle. "Oh but will Hotch be pissed." She giggles to herself, making Spence glare at her before he walks her out.

I just stare at the photo, still lying on the table. All those poor women, why in hell would someone do this to them. What is wrong with this person, who is this freak? I genuinely feel scared as I look at the door, waiting for Spence to return. He does after a couple minutes and sees the fear in my eyes.  
"Honey, it's okay. I'm an FBI agent remember, no one's goanna harm you." He mutters while scooping me up in his arms, pressing me tightly to his chest. "Off course I know that, your superman." I joke and he laughs, though it sounds quit forced, the situation is not very good to make jokes about.


	7. Chapter 7

Gone chapter 7

Spence keeps trying to talk me out of being scared until I shut him up and call Kyle, who thankfully picks up his phone. I explain the situation to him and he immediately stops working and tells me he's coming home. "He better be." Spencer mumbles quietly when I hang up and I slap him on his arm, glaring. "Spencer, don't talk about my husband like that." I tell him and he looks at me with his big puppy eyes. "Oh, so he can talk about me like that but not the other way around? I see…" He complains and I sigh, grabbing his hand and squeezing it. "Baby, I didn't tolerate that he spoke to you like that but I also won't tolerate it if you do." I explain it and he pouts, before he turns serious.

He looks troubled and I frown at him, asking with my eyes what's going on. He inhales deeply and squeezes my hand. "Have you ever considered… you know…" He starts hesitantly and I pull up my eyebrows at him. "Spence, say what you want to say." I mumble, looking at the pain in his eyes. Whatever it is, it's seriously bothering him and it makes me sad, I don't like to see him in pain, how small it may be.

"Okay, but only if you promise me you won't get mad at me and just listen." He says quietly and I nod in confusion. "Good." He mutters to himself and wraps an arm around me, not looking at me while he starts talking. "Have you… considered that maybe, I'm not saying it's true, but that maybe Kyle has something to do with it?" He whispers so silently I almost can't hear him, but I hear him, I hear him clearly. I freeze and turn my head, catching his troubled glance. "What?" I mumble and hear a dangerous tone in my voice. Spence hears it to and he quickly pulls his arms back and stands up. "You promised to listen." He defends and I just stare at him, unable to place what he just said. "What do you mean, Spencer?" I ask him again, very strict and quit angry and he puts a step back. "Nothing Ab, I don't mean anything by it, I just… Have you considered that he might have… might have something to do with it." He says again, eyes focused on the floor and not on me. Well, maybe that's better because I'm becoming very, very angry.

"Wait a minute Spencer, are you suggesting that Kyle, my husband, the father of my child Kyle might have something to do with the murders of seven, now eight innocent woman?" I ask him very detailed and he shrinks a step back again, hating the way I talk to him. "Maybe…" He whispers and I inhale deeply, trying to calm myself. "Do you really think that Kyle might have been able to do something like that Spence? To murder one of my best friends? Do you really think that?" I say again, my voice rising two octaves and breaking twice. Spence winces and looks quit scared actually. "No, Ab I'm not saying that he did it, I'm just suggesting…" He whispers and I shake my head. "Spencer Reid, Kyle would never, ever do something like that, not for anything in the world so don't ever come up to me with a worthless suggestion like that again." I shout at him and walk straight out of the room, not looking at him while I pass him. He shrinks away, looking terribly unhappy and I feel slightly sad for it, but I'm too angry to feel sorry for him. I don't get angry easy, but now I'm boiling with anger. To even think about the fact that my dear little brother is suggesting that my husband is involved with murder is to much for me to handle. The fact that Jessica is dead, that all those innocent woman I knew are dead is becoming to much and before I have reached my bedroom I break down and fall to the ground. I feel the tears steaming down my face and my breath becomes short and high.

In no time Spencer is at my side and wraps his arms around me, pulling me up. "Ssssh Ab, it's okay. I'm so sorry, it's okay." He whispers soothingly in my ear while opening the door and dragging me inside. He puts me down on the bed and I curl up in a ball, heavily crying and closing my eyes in desperation. "Kyle's goanna be home soon honey, I'm just goanna leave you alone." Spence mumbles and kisses me on the cheek lovingly before leaving the room. I badly want him to stay but I let him leave, we just had a fight, we never fight, and we both have to be alone to place it.

I lie on the bed until Kyle comes storming into the room, still in uniform. "Baby! O my gosh, I'm here, sweetheart I'm here." He shouts and cradles me up in his arms. I break down again and cry in his arms, burying my head in his chest, clinging to him. We lie there for what seems like forever, but eventually I'm calmed down and able to talk again.  
"Okay honey, now tell me what's going on." Kyle mumbles comfortingly, while he helps me sit up. I wrap my arms around my stomach, looking for comfort with my little girl and sigh deeply. "It was nothing big honey, I just had a fight with Spence and the truth about what's going on became to much." I explain to him and curse myself, I hate lying to my husband. I am against lying, but there's no way in hell I'm goanna tell him Spence is thinking he has something to do with the murders. He would throw Spence out the house in minutes and I'm not goanna let that happen. I feel safer with Spence around, not because he is an FBI agent but because he always protected me, even though he is my little brother.

"What did he do?" Kyle interrupts my thoughts with a snare and I glare at him, he really has to stop the attitude against Spence. "He didn't do anything Kyle, relax. I need some air, I'm outside if you need me." I mutter and climb off the bed, stumbling downstairs with him behind me. Kyle disappears in his computer room, knowing I need the space and time to talk with Spence.

I walk past the living room and hear Spence's voice in a low murmur. He's on the phone and I don't need to listen to know who he's talking to. He's talking to mom, I can hear it from the tone he's using. "Yes mom, I will apologise to her, she just needs time now to progress what I told her… I know it was wrong mom… Fine, fine, how are you?" I hear him mutter and I chuckle lightly, knowing mom is already punishing him for what he said to me. I already forgave him for what he said, though I do need him to make it up to me but I know he will do that in no matter of time.

I grab the keys for the back door and grab a cigarette out of the secret package I keep in the drawer in the kitchen. I don't smoke usually, only if I really need it, moments like these for example. I open the back door and sit down on one of the swings in our backyard, lighting the cigarette.  
"You know, you shouldn't smoke." I hear a soft voice behind me after my fifth drag and I stand up from the swing, turning around. "Don't tell me what to do, Spencer." I snap at him and quickly regret it when I see the hurt in his eyes, that came out more offending then I meant it to. "Sorry." I quickly apologise and look at the sky, where the sun is shining brightly. "Don't apologise, I know how troubled you are. I should apologise Abby, what I said to you was completely out of line. I never should have talked about it with you and I am terribly sorry I did and made everything twenty times worse for you…" He starts to apologise, but I interrupt him. He sounds so remorseful, I can hear in his voice he hates himself for doing that to me. It makes me smile, not because he is in pain but because he is so cute and sweet, apologising like this to me.

"Don't worry about it Spence. Yes you did hurt me with it and you shouldn't have talked with me about it, but it wasn't wrong to suggest Spence. You are a profiler, an FBI agent, it's your job. You have to consider every possibility, that's what you do." I tell him and see the relieve in his eyes, he at least knows I'm not angry at him and that he's forgiven. "That doesn't change the fact that…" he starts again, but I raise my hand throwing away my cigarette. "You were wrong to discuss it with me, that's true Spence. You have to suggest, but don't talk with me about it. Tell it to your boss, he has to know about it. I can't handle it Spence, I can't handle it if you tell all your suggestions to me, especially not if it contains my husband." I explain to him and he hangs his head, showing me his remorse. "I know and I'm really sorry." He mumbles to the ground and I walk up to him, grabbing his face in my hands. "Your forgiven, okay?" I whisper and he wraps his arms around me, hugging me as tight as he possibly can. "Thank you." He whispers back and I ruffle his hair while clinging to him, in his arms I feel completely safe, as safe as a woman can feel.


	8. Chapter 8

Gone chapter 8

We walk inside together and I take place on the couch with my laptop while Spence calls mom back. I listen to his ramblings while surfing on the internet a little and we're all in peace for a couple moments until Spence's phone rings.

"Oh no, it's Hotch." He winces when he sees the callers ID and I chuckle. "Pick up Spence, the earlier it's done, the better." I tell him and he sighs before picking up. "Hi Hotch… I'm still with my sister… No Hotch, she needed me and I couldn't… I know that, and I'm very sorry but… Hotch, listen to me please. She's here now and… Yes, her husband is here too… Because she's my sister and I… Hotch, please stop interrupting me and let me explain it… I can't just leave here, I can work on the case here too… Well, don't you think she deserves to know, she's a victim too… Yes sir, I'm sorry… No, I can't… Fine, yes sir. I'll be there in twenty… Yes sir."

Spence sighs while hanging up the phone and I can't help but chuckle. "And?" I ask him and he puts his head on my stomach with a sigh. "He's angry to say at least, he was screaming at me to come back and stuff, I'm afraid I won't make it in alive tonight. But we have someone in custody…" He tells me and I laugh, ruffling his hair before I send him away, off to his job where he's supposed to catch a killer. I can't help but feel a little bit less scared now they have someone in custody, Spence's team mostly has the right guy a once. I focus back on the computer, but Kyle walks back in the room. "Honey, I have to go." He mumbles and I frown, trying to look into his eyes but they're fixed on the ground. "Baby, you can't go. I'm in danger, remember?" I tell him a little sarcastic, off course he knows he can't leave now, right? "I know, but believe me, you are completely safe here. I just have to help my guys at work out now, I will only be gone for two hours maximum, okay?" He explains to me but I don't believe a word he said. "Kyle, look me in the eyes and tell me that again." I snap at him and he looks up at me. I look deep into his eyes and I am surprised to see the determination. "You really want to leave me here and leave?" I ask him in disbelieve and he nods in embarrassment, putting a step back. "You are completely safe here Abby, I hear Spencer has someone in custody so you'll be fine." He mumbles and walks right outside, walking out on me. I watch him leave and sigh deeply, what in hell is going on with him? He's acting so weird lately, so distant and now he just leaves me while I am in direct danger. It almost comes across like he doesn't love me anymore, and that hurts. I sigh and grab my mobile phone, I need to call the secret number cause something definitely happened just now.  
I get Morgan on the phone, one of Spence's best friends. "Hi Morgan, it's Abby." I greet him and I can feel him tensing up. "Hey Abby, Reid's arrived here if you want to know that." He replies and I shake my head. "No Morgan, it's not about Spence. My husband Kyle just left the house and I'm alone here now." I explain the situation quickly to him and I hear Spence in the background; 'Kyle left the house?'. "Reid, shut up. Abby, he left while he knows you are in danger?" He asks me and I sigh deeply, standing up from the couch. I'm scared alone in the house, the thought that someone might be after me scares me to death. "Yes, Derek I am quit scared, could you please send someone back here?" I ask him and I hear him shout something to his boss. "Yes, Reid and JJ are coming to you now." He tells me and I sigh in relieve. "Thank you Morgan." I thank him and he tells me 'anytime' before hanging up. I put the phone down and want to walk to the kitchen when the doorbell rings. Well that's fast. I walk up to the door to find Sylvia in front of it. Her face is tear stained and she looks lost, desperately lost. "Honey?" I hesitantly ask and she looks up at me, pure panic in her eyes. "Dad's gone." She whispers and I catch her before she collapses on the ground. I drag her inside and put her down on the couch, but she clings to me so I just wrap my arms around her and rock her back and forth. What did she mean with that? Would George be gone? That's impossible.

"Sweetie, what do you mean with 'Dad's gone'?" I ask her and she shudders in my arms, the poor thing is scared like hell. "He is not at home, he's gone." She repeats and inhales deeply, trying to calm herself down enough so she can talk normally with me. "Sweetheart, I'm sure he's goanna be home soon, he is probably just…" I start, trying to ease and comfort her, but she shakes her head powerfully, fear clear in her eyes. "No, I called him and he… he didn't pick up. There was – oh God there was blood on the carpet." She explains to me and buries her head in my chest while I gasp. Oh God no, this can't be happening. The girl lost her mother two days ago, her father can't be missing. "He can't die too Abby, he just can't. I can't live without him too." Sylvia cries out and I hug her tighter, almost completely hiding her in my body.  
"Honey, I need you to calm down okay? Spencer, you remember my brother? Yeah, he's goanna be here any time with a colleague and they're goanna fix it, okay?" I whisper in her ear and she nods, though none of the pain in her eyes disappears. I just hold her and rock her back and forth, trying to calm her down but nothing works until the doorbell rings. Sylvia curls up into a ball on the couch while I run towards the door, throwing it open.


	9. Chapter 9

Gone chapter 9

"Abby? Ab why is your shirt wet? What happened?" Spence asks the moment he sees my face while JJ pushes past me into my house. "You have to help me Spencer, Sylvia is here in total panic, claiming that her dad is gone. She found blood on the carpet and…" I start to explain but Spence interrupts me by pushing me aside and running after JJ. I stumble back to the living room and see Sylvia in the arms of JJ, telling her the story while Spence is on the phone with probably his boss.

I just stand in the doorpost, watching everything that is happening in front of me. JJ comforts Sylvia while Spence runs in and out of the house with his phone. He shouts something to JJ a couple times and it's clear there is serious panic here. JJ stands up and runs up to me, grabbing my arm. "Abby, stay with Sylvia, it seams like George Jones is abducted an hour ago and we are doing everything to make sure he doesn't become the ninth victim. We have to go back now." She explains to me quickly and I frown. "What? You think this is the same man?" I ask her in disbelieve, I though he only killed woman? "We don't think Ab, we know. JJ, we have to go, now!" Spence adds and kisses me briefly on the cheek before he grabs JJ's arm, pulling her with him out the room.  
I rush to Sylvia and cradle her back up in my arms, kissing her forehead while she cries desperate tears on my shirt. We wait and wait until she calms down and sits up. "Honey, go upstairs and lie down on the bed, your exhausted." I tell her and she nods at me, standing up. "Will you stay with me?" She asks and I can't look at her, her voice breaks my heart. "Off course, I'm goanna call my husband and I'll come right back to you." I promise her and with that she leaves the room. I hear her footsteps on the stairs and as soon as they've faded away I grab my phone and dial Kyle's number. I call him three times, but he never picks up, leaving me frustrated, scared and full of sadness. I walk upstairs and find Sylvia asleep in my bed, tears still on her face. I lie next to her and hug her close, she needs me the most now and I will be there for her, even though the thought of Kyle not picking up his phone concerns me.

It's nine o'clock pm when finally Spence returns to my house with Morgan. I have cooked diner and Sylvia is lying on the couch, watching TV with an expressionless face. She is so worn out by the thought that her father is gone and so full of worry no emotions are coming out. I just sit next to her, holding her hand while Spence and Morgan rush back into the house. Spencer looks deadly serious and very troubled, which makes me really worried.

"Abby, where is Kyle?" He asks me and I shrug at him, that's a good question. "He went back to work around three but he didn't pick up his phone when I called him." I tell him quietly and he frowns, looking at Morgan. "Abby, do you know where he is?" Morgan asks me gently and I shrug. "He said he went back to work." I tell them in confusion. "Ab, he's not at work, we went there and he's not there." Spencer tells me and I stand up from the couch. "What the hell is going on with him? I have no idea where he is, there might be someone after me and he just leaves me alone and now he's not at work?" I shout in panic and Spence grabs my hand. "Are you sure he went back to work?" Morgan asks again and I nod at him, though I'm not that convinced. "Where is he? He can't be gone too!" I mumble in sadness and Spencer wraps his arms around me, hugging me tightly. "He won't be, we will find him honey, don't worry." He whispers in my ear and he looks at Morgan. "Go to George's house again, we must have missed something. I am goanna stay here, I'm not letting her and Sylvia alone without protection. Tell Hotch we have to hurry." He jells at Morgan and Morgan nods, before leaving the house in a rush.

Spence sits down on the couch next to Sylvia and pulls me with him, wrapping an arm around both of us. I feel scared and really confused, I don't have any clue at what is happening anymore. It makes me sick, all this death around me and all the panic about people getting abducted and someone being after me, it wears me out so much that I close my eyes and lean against Spence in exhaustion.

Boom.

"What was that?" Sylvia asks in a little voice, clearly in fear. I sit up to, I heard the sound too, it came from the backdoor. "Spence, what was that?" I ask my brother and he stands up, pulling out his gun. "I don't know, but I'm goanna find out now. Stay with Sylvia." He tells me and I wrap my arms around her protectively while Spence slowly walks to the door that leads to the kitchen. He opens it and disappears through it. I watch him in fear, he is an FBI agent and has a gun, but that doesn't stop me from being afraid for him, very afraid. I slowly reach for my phone and call the safety number. "Hello, Abby?" I hear Emily's voice. "Emily, someone is in my house, Spencer is looking for him now but I need you to come here." I whisper to her as silently as possible, not trying to make any sound. "What? Are you okay?" She asks me, I hear the panic in her voice rising. "I'm not sure, please come quickly." I answer her back and hang up, watching the door closely. Sylvia is shaking and I am too, we're both pretty damn scared, someone is in my house and Kyle's not here.

"Oh thank God, it's you Kyle… Aaaah!" I hear Spencer's scream and jump up at the sound. "Spence? Kyle? Are you okay?" I jell but I don't get an answer, just two men struggling. I get really scared now, is there someone else there?

The moment the living door opens my whole world crashes down. Kyle walks trough the door with the most angry expression I have ever seen on him and he has an arm wrapped around Spencer's neck, holding a gun to his head. I stare at him and he stares back, looking insane. Then the panic reaches me and I stumble back, grabbing Sylvia. "You leave this house now Sylvia, go to the police." I tell her slowly and she nods. When she stands up, Kyle points the gun at her, giving Spencer a rough push. He falls on the ground and coughs, his face in pain. 


	10. Chapter 10

Gone chapter 10

O my God.

He was right, he was right all along. It is Kyle, Kyle murdered all those people. This can't be true, this is impossible. I married him, I'm carrying his baby. I look at Kyle, the first tears rolling down sadly. "Kyle?" I ask, I don't see him in the man that stands in front of me with a gun pointed at a fifteen year old girl. I don't recognise him at all. He doesn't look at me, his eyes are focused on Spencer. "If you move, you're a dead man." He snaps at him when Spence tries to move and I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. My husband just threatened my little brother, punched him and held a gun to his head...

I look back up and step in front of Sylvia, so the gun is now pointed at me. "It was you, wasn't it? Oh God, it was you all along." I spit out at him, anger and disgust replacing the fear. He looks at me and nods slowly, pointing the gun back at Spencer. "God Kyle, why. Why in hell... What are you doing?" I cry out and put my head in my hands, this is to much for me. I can't place this, I love the man who killed eight women. I love him, well I loved him. How could he do this, how could he break my heart and shatter my life like this.

"You killed my mom?" I hear Sylvia's pained voice from behind me and I slowly wrap my arms around her. She doesn't do anything though, she just stares at Kyle with so much pain and sadness I'm impressed she's still able to stand.

"They hurt you, they'd made your life a living hell, they had to pay." Kyle answers to me and his expression falls completely. Now he looks desperately lost, insanely lost. "I had to Abby, please understand. I had to, they had to pay..." He stumbles on and I stare at him, not able to understand. "What in God's name are you talking about. You killed eight innocent women, you killed Sylvia's mother." I shout at him and ignore Spencer, who tries to silence me with his glance. I'm becoming so angry, so angry at him and at myself, that I didn't see this coming, that I couldn't see.

"Yes Abby, they did something wrong. Four of them bullied you in high school, two of them were constantly mean to you and Jessica, she just wasn't worth you." Kyle explains me and I gasp. "You killed her, you killed Jessica, you asshole, how could you do that to her, to me!" I cry out and storm up to him, wanting to hit him so hard, but Spencer jumps up and stops me, wrapping me up in his arms while walking backwards. He hides me and Sylvia behind his own body while looking at Kyle with the most disgusted expression I have ever seen on him. "You have a baby!" He whispers to me and I wrap my arms protectively around my body, hiding my little girl from the monster in front of me.

With a thud Sylvia drops on the floor, unable to handle all the pain and the big truth that's just thrown at her. She rolls up into a ball, but Kyle doesn't seem to notice. He looks at Spencer, hatred in his eyes. "You were always her number one, I should've killed you too." He snaps at him, anger back in his eyes and he points the gun at Spence's chest. "No!" I scream and yank Spence back just in time, a loud bang and the bullet crashes into the wall right at the place where Spence would be standing if I hadn't pulled him away. "You are not goanna touch him ore hurt him, ever Kyle!" I scream and feel the anger boiling in me, overtaking the sadness and disappointment. "I love you Abby, why couldn't you have me on place one, why couldn't you forget about that loser there?" Kyle shouts at me and points the gun at me. He actually points the gun at me, at his wife. Out the corner of my eye I see agent JJ and Rossi coming up at the window, pointing guns at Kyle.

"Kyle, put the gun down! Now!" I hear the heavy voice of agent Morgan behind me and I turn around, seeing Morgan, Hotch and Emily, all with guns pointed at Kyle. "It's over Kyle, put it down!" Emily shouts and I look back at Kyle, seeing his desperation. "I had to!" He cries out again and points the gun at Spence again, who raises his hands. "Kyle, we mean no harm, we don't want to shoot you, so please cooperate, where is George!" He says slowly and Kyle spits at him, glaring at him. "George was in the way, I shot him in a field a couple miles from here, but that's not important!" He shouts and Hotch comes in action immediately, he pulls Sylvia out of the room quicker then Kyle can react and goes of to find George with her.

"It's all your fault anyway, Spencer. You had to be in the way of me and Abby, you had to ruin everything for us!" Kyle shouts and in that little moment I see the determination in his eyes, he's goanna shoot Spence. "No, Kyle don't! Please don't!" I cry out and I hear Morgan shout behind me; "Don't do it!"

Bang.

"Spence, no!" I shout in panic as the gun goes off and shoots a bullet right at my little brother. Morgan sprints at Kyle to take him down, while Emily and I sprint to Spence, who lies on the ground, blood pouring out of a hole in his stomach. "Spence! Oh God, can you hear me! Spencer, please answer!" I cry out while dropping on my knees next to my unconscious brother. "Abby, get back, we'll take it over! I NEED PARAMEDICS!" Emily shouts and Rossi puts his arms around me while JJ rushes over. "God Spence, not again!" She cries out while Rossi takes me out of the house, into the back yard. I struggle as hard as I can, I need to get back to Spencer, now. But Rossi doesn't let go and eventually I stop struggling and bury my head in Rossi's chest, completely breaking down. This can't be happening to me. My husband is a serial killer who just shot my brother, how is this even possible. "Spence can't die, he can't!" I whisper in desperation and Rossi strokes my hair, trying to comfort me. "He won't Abby, Reid is so strong, he will be okay, he will be fine." He hushes and I know he is right, but still. It is all to much for me to handle and I crumble down in Rossi's arms, not able to stop the tears from flowing ore to calm down.  
Rossi just stands there and hugs me, comforts me. I'm Spence's sister and even though he barely knows me, he comforts me. Off course he does, he would do it for Spence anytime, Spence is so loved by his team, and no wonder.  
JJ walks outside and grabs my hand. "Abby, Spence is on his way to the hospital, they've been able to stabilize him and believe he's goanna be okay." She tells me, but her voice is raw and her eyes are wet. Her heart aches, not only for Spence but also for me. She has a husband and a child to and I think she pities me so much because she knows how much my heart must be broken.  
"Thank you JJ, can I please go after him?" I ask and pull myself out of Rossi's arms. "Yes off course, I'll drive you. I'm going there too, we can go together." She tells me and I nod, glad I don't have to go alone. "Thank you Dave, for taking care of me." I tell Rossi and he nods at me. "Anytime Abby, anytime. Go and see Reid." He answers and I kiss him on his cheek briefly, before following JJ back into my house but never letting go of her hand. Everything in the house reminds me of Kyle and it kills me, it kills me inside. I close my eyes as we walk into the living room, I don't have to see Spence's blood, I don't think I will be able to handle that now.

"Abby, can you listen to me for one second?" I hear Morgan's voice and I open my eyes, seeing him standing by the door, looking worried and sad. "Yes." I tell him quietly, making him flinch by how broken my voice sounds. "Hotch found George and he's in the hospital too, Sylvia is with him. It looks like he's goanna make it." He tells me and I gasp in relieve. "Thank God." I breathe and JJ squeezes my hand, giving me a reassuring smile. "We have taken Kyle to the police station for interrogation, if you want we can hold him there so you can speak to him." Morgan adds and I stare at him, I don't think I ever want to see him again, but I also know that I probably can't live without a explanation. "I just want him to tell me why, Derek. But after I know, I don't want anything to do with him, ever." I tell him determined and he nods. "Off course, we'll keep him there okay, go and support Reid." He tells me and JJ walks along, pulling me with her. We get into the car and while I get in a tear escapes my eyes. Now I don't have to be scared about Kyle anymore, all the worries about Spence come out and I'm frightened, frightened to death that he won't make it. That I will lose my little brother after all, after all that happened.


	11. Chapter 11

Gone chapter 11

We drive in silence, JJ drives harder then she is allowed too, but because we're in one of their SUV's, it doesn't matter. JJ doesn't say a word to me, she just grabs my hand and squeezes it supportively, once in a while. I appreciate it, she's as worried as I am about Spence.  
We park the car outside the hospital and walk inside, there is no need to hurry cause we know Spencer is in surgery and us hurrying won't make that go faster.  
"We're here for Spencer Reid, we're family." JJ tells the woman behind the reception and she nods, telling us to sit into the waiting room and that doctor Johnson will come and get us when he's out. We do what she says and sit down in the almost empty waiting room. After a little ten minutes, the rest of the team arrives, accept for Hotch. Even Garcia is there, the woman Spencer told me about so much. I stand up when they walk in and they immediately rush towards me.  
"Oh sweetie I'm so sorry, do they know anything yet? Is he okay? Will he make it?" Garcia asks rapidly while she hugs me tightly. I've never met the woman, but I already think she's adorable and really great. "Hi Penelope, no he's in surgery and when he gets out they'll tell us." I tell her and she smiles faintly at me, before hugging JJ. "Morgan, where is your boss?" I ask Morgan, he doesn't look like FBI anymore but like a very worried older brother. "He is with Kyle at the police station, putting him under interrogation now. He will be here as soon as he can." Morgan tells me and I nod, sitting back down. Then Emily walks in, her hands and white blouse still red from the blood, if you don't know it's not her own blood, she looks terrifying.  
"Oh God Emily, are you okay?" Rossi cries out and she nods, waving their concern away. "Don't worry about me guys, worry about Spence, he passed out in the ambulance and the doctors weren't sure if he's goanna make it when they drove him into surgery." She sighs, looking exhausted, but I can understand it. To see your best friend lifeless and pale, lying on a hospital bed in a ambulance, it's really bad.

We wait and wait and wait and finally, when it's half past eleven pm and I have broken down twice, while running to the bathroom, doctor Johnson comes out. Everyone jumps up at once, hope crossing everyone's faces. My heart jumps, filling with hope too. 'Please don't tell me he died', I pray silently. "Okay everyone, good news. We managed to stabilise him and he survived the operation, he's still unconscious but we think he will make a full recovery." Johnson says and I sigh in relieve, thank God. I don't think I could've lived with the fact that my husband had killed my younger brother. "Is he okay?" I ask anyway and the doctor nods. "Yes, he has a concussion and a couple broken ribs, his head will hurt for a while but besides that and the wound in his side, he is fine." Johnson tells me and I feel Morgan's arms around me, relieve clear on his face. "He's goanna be fine Ab, he's goanna be okay." He whispers in my ear and I nod, tears escaping my eyes but this time because of happiness.

"Can we see him?" Emily asks and the doctor looks at her. "Oh my, you look terrifying. Yes you can see him, but one at a time. I think it's best if only his sister stays for the night and the rest of you get some sleep. And you lady, are coming with me. We need to do something about your shirt. He's in room 324" He tells us and drags Emily with him towards another door. I turn around and see that everyone is about to protest, so I raise my hand. "I can't thank you enough for what you did today, for me and for Spence, but please listen to the doctor and go home. Get some sleep and me and Spence will be here in the morning, okay?" I tell them and everyone sighs. "Fine, but it can't hurt to walk you to his room, can it?" Rossi mumbles and I nod. We walk to the elevator. Morgan doesn't let go of my hand once and JJ wraps an arm around me as we wait for the elevator. I don't know these people very well, I just know them from Spence's stories, but I already feel like I'm a part of them. They act so friendly towards me, like they actually care and it makes me feel safe.

"Okay honey, good luck and we will be right here in the morning." Rossi says when we have arrived in front of Spence's door and I sigh. I don't even know if I want to go in, how can I face my little brother after what my husband did to him. I can't help but feel extremely guilty, and even though Spencer would never blame me, I do. I blame myself for the fact that he's here, shot by my own husband. I blame myself for the fact that I didn't see, if I would've just listened to him instead of denying every fact and pretend to be blind, he wouldn't be here.

"Thank you guys, really. You did something incredible today and you've really been there for me. It was a delight to get to meet you all and Spence's stories are all true. You really are exceptional people and I am really sorry that…" I start, while looking at all the lovely faces who saved me today, but JJ interrupts me. "Don't blame yourself Abby, this was in no way your fault and you have been so brave, but it's time to give in to your emotions. Go to Reid, you both need each other." She tells me and I nod, blinking away the emerging tears. "Thank you." I say again and let Morgan wrap his arms around me. "It's goanna be okay, we're goanna be here in the morning." He tells me before he lets go and pulls the others with him. I wave at them before I inhale deeply and open the door of Spence's room.

I enter and look around. It's a tiny room, Spence's bed stands in the corner. The curtains are closed and apart from a bedside table and a chair, the room is empty. I shuffle closer to the bed and hear my brothers even breathing. I slowly turn around, he's probably sleeping and I certainly don't want to wake him. A part of me wants to hold him, tell him I'm sorry and how much I love him, but another part of me is too frightened to go on the confrontation. Just when I want to open the door to leave, I hear his breathing stutter. "Abby?" His husky voice rings in my ears and I turn around. I am so relieved to hear his voice I can't hold the tears back and storm to his bed.  
"Spence? Oh God Spencer, you are awake." I gasp and sit down on the chair next to his bed, looking at him. His eyes are open and he looks at me, a tiny smile on his face. His hair is messed up and his body is under the covers. He doesn't look that bad right now, even though I know that's not true.  
"Hi." He simply says and I chuckle lightly, grabbing his hand and pressing it to my face, inhaling his sent. A part of me was so scared he wouldn't make it and now I can finally breathe again. "Gosh Ab, you're crying, what's wrong?" Spencer asks me adorably and wipes my tears away with his hand. "God Spence, everything is wrong. I am so sorry, I can't even find the right words to tell you how sorry I am. I messed it all up Spence, it's my fault that you are here and…" I start to sob and bury my face in his hand. "Abby, don't say that. That is not true, nothing off that is true. This is not your fault, neither is it mine. This is Kyle's fault honey, please don't blame yourself." Spencer protests and pulls me up from the chair and on to the bed. I pull the covers over to climb in next to him and that's when I see the bandage. "God Spence, oh no." I gasp, his chest is all covered in bandage and I see a lot of dark blue bruises covering his stomach. "It looks worse then it is Ab, don't pay attention to it." Spence mumbles, but it's all I can look at. That is my fault, my husbands fault. Spence pulls me down next to him and puts the covers back over us, wrapping his free arm around me. "Abby, calm down please." He murmurs in my ear and I bury my head in his chest, trying to calm myself down. It works after a while and we just lay in the bed, his arm around me. 


	12. Chapter 12

Gone chapter 12

"Spence, what am I goanna do?" I ask him at a sudden moment, I just felt the baby kick me and it triggered a thousand questions. Spence turns his head and looks at me with confusion. "What do you mean?" He asks me and I sigh deeply. "I am pregnant, I am having a child, his child. She won't have a father, what am I goanna do?" I repeat slowly. "Abby, this is not his child anymore. This is your child and yours only." Spence answers simply and I shake my head, how much I want to believe that. "It isn't, it's his child too. I don't know if I can do this, raising her on my own." I whisper, a tear rolling down my cheek sadly. Spencer wipes it away and kisses me on the cheek. "You will not have to do it alone honey, you'll have me. I will help you as much as I can. This is your child, he has no rights anymore. He killed eight women and is goanna be locked up for the rest of his life, he has no right." He assures me and I smile at him, I knew he would say that.  
"You don't have to, you know that don't you?" I tell him and he nods, smiling back. "I know, but that doesn't mean I won't, I will do everything you need me to do." He responds and I shake my head, but can't hide my smile. "I love you." I tell him and he sighs, rolling his eyes playfully. "And I love you." He says and wipes away my tears.  
Eventually we both fall asleep in the bed and do not wake up until the nurse walks in at six am to change his bandage. "Oh dear, I don't think this is allowed to happen." She tells me after she woke me up and I quickly apologise to her. "Oh honey, it doesn't matter with me." She assures me and orders me out of the room to get some food for myself while she changes Spence's bandage.  
I do as I am told and walk downstairs to the cafeteria. When I arrive there, I see to my surprise Morgan and Emily, sitting at a table, eating breakfast. "What are you doing here so early?" I ask them while walking closer and they both look up. "Hey Abby, we thought that it couldn't hurt to come here to support you and visit Reid." Morgan answers me with a wink and Emily smiles at me. "How is he doing?" She asks me while I sit down beside them. "He's doing fine, well accept for the bruises and the wound." I tell them and feel tears coming up again, but I force them back. "Good, that's good." Emily mumbles to herself and I nod slowly. "Abby?" Morgan asks me and I hear concern in his voice. "Yes Morgan?" I reply with a smile. "Well, we still have Kyle under interrogation but because Hotch questioned him yesterday evening, we can't keep him that long anymore. To be precisely, only till four this afternoon." He tells me and I look up. "Okay, then I'm going to the police station in a minute, so you can visit Spencer." I tell him and suddenly feel very scared. I never thought I would once become scared of my husband when I married him, but it happened, and how. I don't want to go and see Kyle, but I know I have to. I need to know the exact reason, otherwise I won't be able to live with it.

I eat my breakfast and then I decide that it's now ore never and leave the hospital, sure that Spence is in safe hands with his two FBI friends. I call a taxi and let it bring me home first, not thinking about what I will see if I get there. There are still yellow lines spread around my house, with 'crime scene' on them, but it's my house so I walk past them. I open the front door, not expecting anything to happen. I walk into the living room and that's when I see it. A big red stain of blood still lies on my living room floor, Spence's blood. I gasp when I see it and quickly turn away from it, it hurts like hell to see it.  
I try not to think about Kyle much when I walk upstairs to the bathroom, but everything reminds me of him, everything. In the shower I break down and start sobbing while sitting down in the bathtub. I need to progress this, but right at the moment it hurts so much my heart is goanna break again. A murderer, a monster lived in this house and I know that I can't stay in this house, it will haunt me down till my death.  
I get out of the shower when I'm calmed down again and dress myself. It's quit warm outside, I didn't even notice that.  
I walk back downstairs and realise that it's time. Time to face my demon, time to face the monster that ruined my life and ruined my baby's life. I still can't understand why he would do this to me, to his baby. Well, it isn't his baby anymore, he lost all his rights. I walk outside and get in to my car. It's time and I have to watch my emotions, I don't want to show him weakness. I don't know how, but when I realised Kyle was the murderer, my heart stopped loving him. It's weird actually, cause a couple weeks ago I thought I would spend the rest of my life with him, but now I don't even love him anymore. Maybe a little part of me does, but the bigger part of me hates him and feels disgust.

I drive down to the police station and park my car. I breathe in deeply and then walk towards the entrance. The closer I get to Kyle, the sadder I get and the harder it gets to hold back my emotions. 


	13. Chapter 13

Gone chapter 13

I see Hotch standing by the entrance, looking really worried. I walk up to him and he looks up at me. "Hi Abby, how are you?" He asks me, hugging me quickly. "I guess I'm fine, A little shaken up but okay." I tell him, nerves breaking my voice. He nods understandingly and puts a hand on my shoulder. "You take your time Abby, there will be guards with you when you talk to him and this is your conversation, not his." He assures me and I nod quickly, that there will be guards does calm me down a little. "How is Reid?" Hotch asks me after a little silence and I see that his worry is really about that. "He's goanna be fine, besides the wound and bruises and stuff he is doing okay now." I tell him quietly and he sighs. "Good, let's get this over with Abby. I will be there with you and when it's done, we'll drive back to the hospital together, okay?" He suggests and I nod at him, smiling slightly. "Thank you Hotch, I appreciate it." I tell him and he gives me a kind smile, before he turns around and walks inside. I follow him closely and that is the first time I get to see the BAU close up.

It's not their BAU, theirs is in California, but they set up here anyway and now I can finally see how they work. I can see Garcia behind lots of laptops and computers, typing faster then I have ever seen anyone type. She looks up when we come in and squeals.

"This is Garcia, but I believe you already met her." Hotch introduces her and I smile at her. She smiles back a huge smile and stands up from her chair. "We didn't meet properly, so hi." She says and runs up to me, hugging me tightly. "Oh believe me Penelope, Spencer has told me so much that it seems like I've known you for years." I tell her and she chuckles.

"Unbelievable, isn't he. We think we know the guy completely, suddenly a secret big sister appears who knows more about us then even we do." She laughs and I shake my head, she is damn right about that.

"Where is everyone?" I ask Hotch, who looks at his agent with a smile. "Morgan and Emily are at the hospital with Reid, JJ is with Sylvia and George and Rossi is getting our Garcia some coffee, she works the best on coffee." Hotch tells me with a chuckle and I giggle, Spence told me about that. "Yeah, well. Now Reid isn't here to get me my coffee someone else has to do it." Garcia says while rolling her eyes and sits back down in her tiny little computer bubble. Spencer told me about that too, that he always got her coffee. She doesn't even need to ask him anymore, he always gets her coffee when they work. He also told me why, but I think I'm goanna keep that to myself. I don't want Garcia to love my little brother even more.

"Abby, are you ready?" Hotch pulls me out of my thoughts and I turn around to face him. I sigh deeply and nod. "Yes, let's get it over with." I reply, pushing back the fear and anger that rises in me. I have to be careless when I sit there, opposite from the monster that is still my husband. That really has to change too, the fact that he is my husband.

"Hotch, what am I goanna do about the fact that he is still my husband?" I ask Hotch and he smiles reassuringly at me. "I already thought about that Abby. Look, normally both the husband and the wife have to sign the divorce papers, but in this case it's slightly different. The judge will demand that Kyle has to sign before they will accept the divorce papers." He explains to me, but I'm not happy with that. It only makes me more worried. "But what If he doesn't accept, I have no idea what he will do but what do I do when he doesn't. I mean, I can't stay married to him, I want him out of my life as fast as possible and how can I do that when I can't divorce him." I protest and Hotch puts a hand on my shoulder, ignoring my worries. "Abby, if he refuses we will explain your situation to the judge and I assure you the judge will cooperate." He tells me in a very certain voice and I sigh in relief, I don't know what I would do if I couldn't divorce Kyle.

"Okay, now I'm really ready." I mumble and Hotch leads me to the interrogation room, where Kyle sits in his chair, bound and looking at the ground. I immediately feel anger and hate rising in my heart when I see him from behind the glass, but I also feel pity. I feel disgusted with myself and when Hotch nods at me, I open the door and step into the room. I close the door behind me and Kyle looks up. His eyes grow wide with hope and happiness when he sees me and almost jumps out of his chair. "Abby, you are here." He whispers to me but I don't say a word, I just stare at him coldly. He sees the change in my eyes immediately and hope and happiness fades away. "You are not here to get me out, are you?" He asks me sceptically and I raise my eyebrows, how in hell can he think that in the fist place.  
I inhale deeply before I take place in front of him. He just stares at me with his big blue eyes I once fell in love with. "Abby…" He starts, but I interrupt him as soon he starts speaking. "I will talk here Kyle, you shut your mouth and you listen to me." I snap at him and now he raises his eyebrows, though he stays quite. "Kyle, I am here for two reasons. Reason one is to ask you why you did what you did." I tell him and he looks at me, waiting for the second reason. "So? Why?" I push him, not wanting to bring the divorce up now cause then he will shut down and not tell me anything.

"I have already told you why I did what had to be done." He tells me and I shake my head. "I want the whole story Kyle." I say and try my best to not raise my voice, if I show any kind of emotion now he will know how torn up I am about this.

"Okay, I guess you have the right to know. Well, I can remember clearly all the evenings when we lay in bed together and you told me horrible high school stories about friends who let you down, who were cruel and merciless to you. You remembered so many times that I started to hate those people. And I saw them everywhere, at neighbour parties, if I went out to drink a beer, cause their husbands were my friends. And every time I saw them I realised how much they hurt you and my hate just grew bigger and bigger. But I always kept it in, not wanting you to know about it. Then you come home, you had a fight with Jessica and it got pretty nasty. She called you horrible names, she hurt you. Abby, you just got hurt and hurt over again by those people, someone had to do something about it. Had to punish them for it. And I did that. I know that what I did was wrong and terrible and that I deserve to be locked up for the rest of my life. I'm so sorry." Kyle explains to me and ends his story with the apology, looking at me, searching for any forgiveness.

I just stare at him in disgust, how twisted of a man can you be if you think murdering is the option. I'm shocked and that's an understatement. "Please say something." Kyle murmurs and reaches his bound hands out to me, but I back away and he pulls them back. "You ruined my life." Is the only phrase I can get out and Kyle bows his head. "I am sorry, but I had to. They were ruining your life too and I had to stop them. Off course what I did was not good and I am so sorry I ruined your life even more." He apologises again and I shake my head, how in hell did he get so twisted that he truly believes that those women were ruining my life and that he had to safe me from them.

"Let me say this once Kyle, you did not save me. You hurt eight innocent women, you hurt my best friend and I will never forgive you for that." I tell him, not really knowing what else to say. I feel so much sadness and pain that it keeps me blinded. "I knew you would say that, but I will try to fix it. I mean, you are my wife and we will figure it out." Kyle mumbles assuring a I snap. I completely lose any self control I had and jump off the chair. "You idiot, you sick bastard. Don't you see what's happening, don't you see what you did? You are a monster, you are a murderer and I am in no matter your wife, I never will be again. You hurt me in all ways possible and I want you to disappear out of my life as fast as possible." I scream at him with my voice full of hate and he stares at me. "I can't disappear out of your life Abby, I'm your husband and you are carrying my child." He simply tells me and I have to use all my self-control to not walk up to him and hit him as hard as I can.

"This Kyle, this is my child." I tell him instead, putting my hands on my belly. "You have absolutely no right, you are not her father and she will never be yours, she is mine." I add and look at him with so much determination, while he stares back with sadness. "You can't do that Abby, I love her, she's my little girl, how can you take her from me?" He asks me in a silent whisper and I shake my head. "Watch me Kyle, you are goanna be locked up for the rest of your life, this is my baby and you will never see her again. Believe me Kyle, I'm taking her from you." I tell him and a first tear rolls down his cheek.

"Did Spencer tell you that?" He asks me and I feel the anger boiling in my heart. "If you ever say his name again Kyle…" I threat and Kyle shakes his head. "I'm sorry I shot him Abby, but he deserved it." He tells me and I decide to sit back down, I can keep myself calm better. "You shot my little brother Kyle, you know how much he means to me, how much I love him and you still shot him." I tell him accusingly, it's too late to go for the 'I don't care' so I let that one behind me.

"I was caught up in the moment, trapped and really mad at him. He destroyed all our chances of being happy together, all our chances. He was always your number one, you would pick his side no matter what had happened. I am very sorry that I shot him, I know he could've died. He just…" Kyle tries to explain to me, but I interrupt him. "Sorry is not goanna cut it, Kyle, not now, not ever. You completely ruined us, you destroyed us." I tell him and he really starts to cry now and a second I feel pity, but the hate overpowers it immediately.

Kyle doesn't say anything and I decide that it's time to bring up the divorce papers, I don't want to be in this room with him anymore, the quicker I can leave the better.  
I grab the papers and put them down in front of Kyle on the table. He looks at them, not understanding. "I need you to sign those Kyle." I tell him and he shakes his head. "What are they?" He asks me and I sigh deeply, this is goanna be hard. "Divorce papers, I need you to sign them." I tell him again and his eyes grow wide. "What? Divorce papers. No way Abby, I'm not goanna divorce you." He tells me and I nod, this was exactly what I expected. "Well, I am divorcing you Kyle, so you can cooperate now and sign them, ore I'll get it done another way, but I will divorce you Kyle, one way ore another." I tell him firmly and he looks at the papers with pain in his eyes. "Abby, please. I know that what I did is unforgettable, but…" He starts, but I shake my head. "I will never be able to forgive you Kyle, never." I tell him and he hangs his head.

"Will you sign the papers?" I ask him again and with a tiny nod he grabs the pen and signs. I sigh in relief, at least I can divorce him immediately. When he signed I stand up and grab the papers. "Thank you Kyle." I mumble and pull of my wedding ring, dropping it on the table in front of him, before I walk towards the door, knowing that this will be the last time I will ever see him again. "Abby, will you visit me?" He asks me and I turn back around, tears in my eyes. "No." I tell him honestly, not wanting to give him false hope. "Have you stopped loving me?" He asks me again and I look him in the eyes while I answer. "My heart stopped loving you the moment I found out." I tell him, turn around and walk out of the room.


	14. Chapter 14

Gone chapter 14

Hotch catches me when I walk outside and I burst down crying. That was horrible, that was plain horrible. I want to hate the man so much, but a part of me still cares for him. It's so twisted, so two sided and it's so hard for me. "You did it Abby, now you never have to see him again." Hotch soothes me and I nod, giving him the papers. "Here, please do it as quickly as you can." I tell him while wiping my tears away. "Yes, off course. We'll bring them to Garcia and then we'll go back to the hospital, okay?" He comforts me and together we walk to the conference room, where Garcia promises me she'll have it done in no matter of time. After that, Hotch and I walk back to my car. He drives us back to the hospital in silence, which I am glad for. I don't want to talk about what I just went through, I have to give that a place myself first. I know I will eventually have to talk about it with Spence, but the longer I can deny that, the better.

We arrive at the hospital and immediately walk on towards my brothers room. Hotch hasn't seen him at all since yesterday and when we walk into the room, I am glad to see him with a smile on his face. Morgan and Emily are sitting by his bedside and they are playing cards, though it's clear they are almost done. "Hello Reid, how are you feeling?" Hotch asks Spencer while he grabs a chair and sits down next to Derek, who is still looking very concentrated at his cards. "I'm feeling quite good Hotch, thanks." Spencer answers, still not having noticed me in the door opening and puts his final cards on the sheets, grinning happily. Morgan groans and slams his cards down as well, though I can see the twinkles in his eyes. "Damn you, pretty boy. It doesn't matter in what state he is, he will still outsmart all of us." He growls and ruffles Spencer's hair happily. "Off course he will." I chuckle and step into the room, closing the door behind me. Everyone looks up and Spencer immediately sits straight up in his bed. With a wince and a yelp he falls back and I rush to his side. "Spence, how many times have I told you to stop moving so fast." I beam at him and he looks at me apologetically, before patting the bed. I sit down next to him and grab his hand, hoping I didn't look like I've cried. In the end that wouldn't matter, because Spence has always looked right through any mask I ever put on.

"How did it go, did he sign the papers?" Emily asks me, sounding quite hesitant and I smile at her. "Yes, eventually he did." I tell her and I hear Spence sigh with relief while he squeezes my hand. "What did he say Ab?" He asks me carefully, his eyes soft and full with sadness. "Spence, can we please not talk about this right now?" I plead with him silently and after staring at me for a while, he nods and reaches for the cards. With a wince he falls back again, looking quite frustrated. "Here, want to do another round?" I ask him while grabbing the cards and he nods at me excitingly. I chuckle while shaking the cards in my hands, sometimes he can be such a child. But I love him for that.

We sit and play cards for hours on and eventually Hotch and Emily take off. JJ comes around after diner, together with Garcia and Rossi and when it's ten o'clock in the evening, they decide to leave as well. After they've all hugged Spencer and said goodbye, I turn to my little brother. He smiles at me and yawns, making me chuckle again. "Aaaw you look so cute, I wish I could just tug you in and read you a bedtime story like I used to years back." I grin and he groans, hiding his face behind his hands. "Don't ever say that again, I am twenty six for God's sake." He complains and I giggle, ruffling his hair.

We play around for a while more, until Spence yawns four times in a row and I decide it's time for bed. "Come on Spence, you need your rest." I tell him while I make a move to stand up from the bed, but Spencer grabs my arm and pulls me back down. "No, I will not be able to sleep before you have told me everything that happened with Kyle, Abby." He tells me firmly and I groan. "Spence, please. I don't want to relive it again…" I start in a pleading voice, but he shakes his head. "I know you Abby, I know how this will haunt you and will give you sleepless nights for months. Talk with me about it, you know I will only listen." He mumbles softly and looks at me. When I look in his soft eyes, realising he is right, I give in and lean against his chest carefully while he wraps his arms around me.

I tell him everything in detail, everything. I am not used to talking that much, that's usually Spence himself, but now I talk until my voice gets hoarse. I spill out all my worries, all my pain and all my tears as well. And Spencer just listens, he just listens, wipes the tears from my face and kisses my forehead repeatedly to calm me down.  
At the end he finishes the conversation with the sentence; "I will protect you from all the danger in the whole world, I didn't catch a bullet for nothing! And I will protect your little girl as well honey." And that makes me fling my arms around him and cry, for the first time, with tears of happiness. He is really the best brother I could wish for, anyone could wish for. He is perfect.


End file.
